This year sure flew by fast! I remember last year, as we were having our New Year's gathering, we went around the table talking about resolutions for 2014. Among many, losing weight seemed to be at the top. I was one of the ones who said it, but as the words came out of my mouth I had already, in my brain, decided this would not really happen.
You see, I can't even remember how many years I have said I would lose weight January 1st. I would give it a try, more like a half assed attempt and eventually give up as soon as it got "hard". So as 2013 started, I had already figured that nothing different would happen in 2014 yet I still felt obligated to say this would be THE year. When my birthday came in June, I had hit my heaviest. I made myself step on the scale and was floored to see that my short 5.1 foot self was up to 305 pounds. It was insane! But somehow, I had allowed myself to believe I was not that bad off. Heck, when I started the blog, I rounded my initial weight to 300 because I guess 5 pounds made such a big difference in my mind...note to self: 300 is no better than 305 lol Bless my heart.
I am now on day 162 of daily food logging (The first 2 weeks of logging, I did not cut back I just wanted to see how much I was eating) , day 31 of daily weighing and day 30 of walking a minimum of 2.5 miles a day. Weight wise I am currently at 260 pounds. That is a total of 45 pounds lost. Although it is just a tiny part of all I have to lose and it has not been as fast as I wished it would be, I am proud of myself.
I used to use so many excuses, I have PCOS, I am too busy, I have no willpower,my ankle is injured...they don't work anymore ecause I don't allow myself to accept them. I have struggled (a lot), I have fought myself (constantly), I have been frustrated with my body enough to cry (more times than I care to admit) but when I have messed up, I have done my best to not wallow in self pity too long, dust it off and push through.
Of course, sometimes the dusting and shaking it off process has taken a few days but I get there. With a little help from my friends as they say. I am constantly amazed at some of the bloggers out there, their inspiration and passion for health is contagious and inspiring. --I don't want to play favorites because there are several but I have to give a shoutout to Gwen at The Sunny Coconut. I want to be like you when I grow up ;)- Even those bloggers, who seem to have hit a rough patch, can still inspire me as I can see and learn from what they are going through.
So to all, THANK YOU! your words matter, your posts make a difference and you are reaching more and deeper than you think. As 2015 approaches, I am not making any resolutions. I am continuing my commitment to myself. I will continue to comit to my journey, no matter how long or hard it will be. I am commiting to learning and taking away the things from my diet that hurt me both physically and emotionally. Most important of all, I am commiting to removing the power that food and food addiction has always have in my life. I am taking my life back and working to be the best me I can be. A new year, A new Start and a New Way to go....Here's to 2015 may our year be full of health,energy, accomplishments, understanding, learning and love!